Thursday, January 6, 2011

MISERABLE JOY

Julia

Juju bees

Jules received all kinds of mixed messages from Santa this year. Things like a Ripstick that yelled, "YOU'RE JUST A KID!" and then a blow dryer, flat iron and make up that screamed, "JUSTIN BIEBER IS HOT!" Either way, a terrible thing to do to a kid. Stupid Santa.

Too young to shave? That's what I told her. And I didn't want to let her—let's just be clear as an ice pellet on that point. But when your daughter says, "I think I looked pretty today at church. Lots of people were looking at me...but I think they might have just been looking at how hairy my legs are"...well, pretty much you have no choice. Otherwise, you'll be paying for the therapy.

So today, I went in to get my hair done, and she pled to come along and have her hair trimmed and layered. I smiled condescendingly, patted her head and said no. Then, as I sat there in the salon chair, I was overcome with lunacy and called to tell her to get ready—I was going to bring her back and let her have some soft highlights and layers.

She went BAT-POO CRAZY!

I led her back to the chair, and returned to the waiting room, occasionally glancing back to see how she was doing. She's sitting there, dressed in black plastic cape and foil, and I suddenly realize what's happening.

"NO, WAIT! NOT YET! I DIDN'T MEAN FOR HER TO GROW UP. DO OVER! DO OVER! I CALL DO OVER! I JUST WANTED TO WIN THE FUN MOTHER AWARD, BUT I REALLY DIDN'T MEAN IT! GIVE HER BACK! GIVE HER BACK TO ME! NO MORE PRETTY. PUSH DOWN ON HER SHOULDERS, REALLY HARD....LET'S TRY TO STUNT HER GROWTH. JUST A FEW MORE YEARS OF THE UGLY STAGE. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.......don't let her be big. I'm sorry. Oh, I'm so sorry. It's too late. I didn't realize. I'm the one who gave her mixed messages. It was me. I told her it was okay. But now.............please, let it begin again. I'm not ready for Juju bees to be gone."

So my little girl has crossed over the line. Or, quite possibly, was pushed by an overanxious mother, rushing to see what was on the other side. And it wasn't what she expected.

I find myself in a state of miserable joy, my friends.


16 comments:

Julianna said...

Congrats? :) I just love that you're yelling "DO OVER!" and no one's listening... story of my life.

Jana and Family said...

Thank you for this! I remember going through this very thing with my girl. She is now almost 19 and trying so very hard to find herself.
I find myself wishing often I had been a better Mother. All the while find her an amazing anomaly.
I am amazed and inspired by her every day, yet she is one of my biggest fears all at the same time. I am amazed that God trusted her to my care and pray daily that I will do her the justice she is worth!

Stef said...

Oh boy. If only she knew how unfun shaving your legs can be. Though, my daughter has an excessive amount of leg hair and she is only 8. But I get the whole growing up too fast. Do Over indeed!

Garden of Egan said...

She is darling! I totally love her hat.
I can't believe she let you take a picture of her shaving her legs! Now that is gonna call for some therapy.
You get a picture shaving her legs and we don't get to see a picture of her hairdo?
Come on!!!!!

As far as wanting the do over....I hear ya.
My baby is 19! How did that happen?

Accidental Photographer said...

Very well put! and thats all I got to say!

Mimi Sue said...

VERY well said. And too true. And we all feel that way at one time or another. And our mothers probably felt that way too. After the comment about the hat and the church dress I was a little worried. But no need to call the What Not to Wear people. With you guiding her she'll do just fine. (If she'll let you...) Good luck! Mimi

The Martos Fudge said...

AWWWW, I cannot imagine when that day comes. I know I am going to be the one making her get the manis and pedis, and cool hair cuts, and oh my gosh... I am sorry that time came to soon. But you do get the coolest mom award.

Natalie said...

Lisa, Lisa!!!! I only got their ears pierced!!! What the H am I suppose to do with the girls now when they see Julia!!! I think you may have just started a war at my house. I am NOT ready for this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Holly said...

We get a picture of her SHAVING but not the AFTER of the new DO??? HOLY JUNK, LISA!! (LOL!! I just wanted to use your phrase!!)

She's NEVER had an ugly stage... you just don't want her "Drop dead gorgeous, long legged beauty... Ster has to stand behind her with a gun every time a boy comes within 50 ft of her... stage!!

Hope you forgive me for "liking" that horrible book! I guess "LIKE" isn't the right word... More like... ??? I'm not sure WHAT to call it... LOL!! But then again, I like crime drama, too... Rich HATES THEM!! It's not that I like details of horrible crimes, just to see how they put pieces together and GET the bad guy in the end... Yeah... I'm weird!

((HUGS))

imbeingheldhostage said...

How do you NOT give mixed messages when peers are speeding by adolescence at such an alarming rate?
Bless you for having to suffer this, but it made for great reading :-)

Meredith said...

Oh Man! I hear ya Lisa! My oldest is about to turn 13! Yes! 13!!! And it makes me so sad... I look at my little one and think, "Abby use to look like you. Abby, use to talk like you too." :( And pretty soon.. I'm gonna say "where are all the little ones?"

Brittney said...

This was the cutest post :) I'm freaking out about the idea of leaving my one-year old baby for a week this summer... I'm sure it will always be hard to let go!

Just a bed of roses said...

I UNDERSTAND your miserable state of JOY Lisa.
The two pictures shows how confused Santa had to be this year,I love Julia & juju Bees couldn't be any more adorable.

The hair color thing...you did the right thing.
Now... when my little 3 year old granddaughter came walking in last year with highlights...I must say "freaked out" for awhile. x daughter in law I thought" what has she done!" But x daughter inlaw colors her hair something different every month, so this is normal, right?
So I just try to UNDERSTAND. It's kind of like when I was growing up and could never get my ears pierced until I was a SENIOR AND THEN I HAD TO SNEAK by having a friend freeze my ear with an ice cube and she pierced them!( well of course I fainted and my mother wasn't there to catch me!)

Glad you called and made her day!
You just started something...just wait and see!

One Cluttered Brain said...

Yes, they do grow up so FAST.
I love the hat though.
Cute.
Not so sure about the razor. Yikes. Net my almost 12 YO will be asking about that.

cindy-stitches-n-stuff.blogspot.com said...

Tears are in my eyes. What a tender moment and what a big paradine shift, for both of you. I think she is adorable, the hat, well, it's grand. I can see your anticipation of what's next with this beautiful young women. So many good things are in store, for both of you, just enjoy them. Your a very thoughtful and giving mother, and so fun. It's going to be great.


Biggest hugs today
cindy@stitches

cindy-stitches-n-stuff.blogspot.com said...

Tears are in my eyes. What a tender moment and what a big paradine shift, for both of you. I think she is adorable, the hat, well, it's grand. I can see your anticipation of what's next with this beautiful young women. So many good things are in store, for both of you, just enjoy them. Your a very thoughtful and giving mother, and so fun. It's going to be great.


Biggest hugs today
cindy@stitches