I went back to bed, I'll admit that.
Then Angie came by and started stirring up pots, pointing out what miserable shape my house was in. Seems I hadn't realized we'd only painted HALF WAY UP MY WALLS, PEOPLE! Who does that? Painters tape and sheets of plastic were everywhere, and I have no idea why we hadn't noticed it before! Plus, Sterling had removed the baseboards throughout the entire house, sometime in the last year, and it had just become white noise to both of us, until this visitor came to scrutinize our living conditions.
I tried to rectify the situation with lies and head nods, suggesting that this was only temporary~that no, in fact, we hadn't put the paint away, it was just "resting" in the closet. I grabbed a bottle of acrylic craft paint, and started squirting some midnight blue onto newly installed fretwork and corbels, so she'd think I was on my game, all the while barking out orders to "GET THIS PLACE IN ORDER!" while Angie walked away with eyeballs rolling back into the far recesses of her skull.
So I woke up.
Thanks a lot, Angie.