Me-"Why are all these people draped across chairs, holding bolts of fabric? Half of them are dozing."
Mom-"I know. How weird. It's been a long day, so maybe they're just worn out."
Me-"Oh, good. Here's the fabric we wanted. I'll go pull the numbered ticket, so we can get through the line faster. (pull ticket) Our number is 47 and they're on 30. Geez. This is going to take a while."
Mom-"Well, let's just wander around for a few minutes while we wait." (20 minutes passes)
Mom-"Hey. What number did they just call? I think that was 52. Oh, crap! We missed our number!"
Me-"I'll run up and see if they'll let us in."
Angry cutter lady-"G54...G54!"
Me-"Oh, hey. I missed my nuh....wait, did you say G? Wait, so there are LETTERS, too? Letters mixed with numbers? So if mine says H47...abcdefgh...so, then, how many numbers are assigned to each letter? Are there like, another HUNDRED to go, before you make it around to H47? Is that what's going on here?"
(Angry villagers strewn about fabric cutting area give me a collective eyeball roll)
Random customer-"We've. been. here. for. two. hours. and. twen. tee. minutes."
Me-"HOLEEEEE HE.......COW, PEOPLE! ARE YOU SERIOUS? FOR WHAT, LIKE TEN BUCKS SAVINGS? ARE YOU...wow. (pulling pitchforks out of purses and flipping Bics to light torches) Wow. Okay. Good luck with that."
And we heard the faint cry as we screeched out of sight, "MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, NOW WHERE'S G59...G59!"