Wednesday, September 1, 2010

MY NEWBORN BABE!

THANK THE HEAVENS ABOVE, I FINALLY HAD MY BABY! And, she's beautiful, absolutely beautiful, peeps. She weighed 8 lbs 5 oz, which you'd have never guessed, seeing as how I practically dozed through the entire natural birth. And yes, I DID say AU NACHO (not Dorrito 'nacho' but rather 'nAcho'~short A, like CAT)-RAAALLLL...in a tub, no less, thankyouverymuch!

Now some of you might go all smug on me here, and claim that I can only count a child as mine, if I actually delivered the babe from my very own girthy abs. To which I roll my eyes while explaining...condescendingly ...HE-LLOOO...I had it VICARIOUSLY, people. Duh. Through my sister? And since she used the name I had previously mentioned I would have used, should I have had another daughter...well, I think it's pri-tty clear that she had my baby.

I also think it goes without saying that anyone willing to gain sympathy weight and/or grow a burly flesh sack along with the baby mama, well, she deserves to receive the newborn child as a parting gift.

Sort of like a SWAG-BAG. A baby swag-bag that was left over from the Emmys.

Anyway, I've taken possession of this little girl...if not physically, then at the very least mentally, emotionally and spiritually. And I'll admit it's probably best this way~that someone else should lactate and suffer excruciating after-birth pains rather than me, on account of my Princess and the Pea fragile constitution. Plus, lest I forget, I'll always have the tangible manifestation of this vicarious pregnancy in the form of burly sag flesh sack remnants.......

........maybe I can fill it with potatoes. Or onions.

Oh, no, wait. That's burlap. Never mind.




P.S.~2nd visit to Zupas...




12 comments:

Amberlee said...

Whew so glad she is here and all is wel. I offered to catch the babe, for a while there I thought maybe she'd take me up on it. I too feel as though I had the phantom pregnancy going on... oh wait that part is real, CRAP.

The Martos Fudge said...

Congratulations... I think you should have a part of that baby,after all you chose the name.

Holly said...

I am so PROUD of YOU!! BEAUTIFUL vicarious JOB!! Can't WAIT to see pix of your new darling!! ;D

LOL!!! I just HAD to let you know what the verification word is!!!
whimp

Natalie said...

I too feel as you do.... I am now finally able to take a deep breath and not gag on food. So glad that little angel is here! I was inspired in a dream a couple of weeks ago that this baby was a girl... so she is part mine too! :)

Krista said...

You are a true, true sister. Sympathy weight and everything. You are such a giver. I'm so lucky to have you for a friend. Take care of that lil' angel and where's the pictures of you with no make up and holding the baby? Must see!

T said...

well I guess congratulations ARE in order - twice to Zupas AND a babe... sounds like a perfect week!

and yep - we need pictures so we can all ogle and gain a few pounds.

Brenda @Just a Bed of Roses said...

Your rewards will await you in Heaven saintly Lisa...however to claim a baby yours and not suffer the excruciating after-birth pains will add some black marks to your record.
Congratulations this has ended for Kera and she has a beautiful baby for all those to dote on...your parents have got to be the best to dote...did your dad have the camera rolling???

Kara Elmore said...

That's weird ... I don't even recall you coming to visit me ... SO - does that mean you snuck in in the night and STOLE her from me while I slept? Did you give her popsicles? Did you give her a piece of gum? And btw - I've received SEVERAL emails about "making sure I keep her away from "the princess".

:)
I love you. And YES - I had her FOR YOU - because you refused to have her yourself. And the ABUNDANCE of gifts you bestowed upon our child was enough to make up for the birth.

I LOVE YOU! AND today is your birthday - SHOUT HORRAY!

See Mom Smile said...

That little girl is so lucky to have you for an auntie. Is it your birthday? Can I eat a cupcake to celebrate? I was going to anyway so i might as well dedicate it to you!!

Brenda @Just a Bed of Roses said...

Happy Birthday Lisa!
Your mother must of been buying the little kitty trick or treater for you???
Did Sterling indulge MORE diamonds upon princess Lisa?(can you tell there's a little jealousy there...well, there is!)

Mimi Sue said...

The only way to have a new baby...vicariously! AND no new stretchmarks! Happy Birthday! Mimi

Serene is my name, not my life! said...

Oh yea for babies!

But I voted for the stork in heaven. I was out-voted. Silly women.

And everyone is saying Happy birthday! Is it your birthday? If so, Happy Birthday!