STAGES

I just went for a quick drug run, as a result of a plea from Jules calling from school with an allergy related something or other whine. Seems lately she needs constant reassurance that her mother will come jetting to her aide at her plaintive beckon call. Which, surprisingly, I'm OK with. It's called a stage, but sometimes dresses up as eternal, so the two are often confused.

Some of you are still choreographing and learning your lines on that platform. "Midnight vomit on the bed"......."Perpetual Hunch Back Baby Hover" and the crowd pleaser, "Necklace ripped off, and cascading beads in church pew." I won a Tony for that one.

While the curtain is up and you're starring, you can't imagine the blessed day will arrive when they're all in school, the house is still and you're lounging in your robe with a glass of ice cold Dr. Pepper, Halloween candy and a laptop in your reclining chair at noon thirty. Not that I'm experiencing such a thing presently, my friends.

No. (shaking head in pensive manner)

I'm deep cleaning my house.

And decorating for fall.

And pruning the frenzied rose bushes.

Plus, I'm canning peaches, pears and tomatoes, making freezer jam and sharpening my lawn mower blades for next year. Homemade bread is in the oven and I've made a mental list of the groceries I'll need when I prepare my family a gourmet meal this evening.

THAT is what I'm doing.

And I'm sorry if it makes you feel guilty and uncomfortable that my level of activity is swelling and cresting over you like a Tsunami on the shore. But it is what it is, people. And it is spectacular!

Anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah. I have bugs in my nose holes and hair, on account of a Ten Commandments locust like swarm I biked through on my way to the school. I thought it was ash from the Herriman fire. But it wasn't. It was bugs. From Hell. And that's a place, people...NOT a swearword.

Just examine the scriptures.

Which are sitting open on my table, on account of me being able to read them in silence, on account of the stage I happen to be in at this time of my life, on account of going through those other stages, and somehow, making it out alive with no poop under my fingernails.

Which gives me more time to quote the word of God to YOU, helping you to become a better person~more righteous~and able to recognize the difference between profanity and where Satan dwelleth.

Long story short~you're welcome.

The end.