It's painful to watch. If you're a male and you even LOOK like you might be about to pronounce a word incorrectly, it's best to just go prone, as every A-cup sportin' girl in the group senses trepidation and takes the sprinter position of "predatory-animal-about-to-make-a-kill"~ at the ready to ATTACK and ANNIHILATE the feeble reader, hissing and biting out the correct annunciation before it has a chance to drip off the obviously daft tongue.
The poor lads just stammer and stutter their way through the excruciating 20 minute routine, eyes darting up to the girl's faces, as unfamiliar words cause them to tremble and sweat. Every once in a while, they get through a passage without making a single mistake, and there is a sweet moment of triumph. But it's rare, folks. And short lived. Because all little Britney has to do is roll her eyes and the win is dis.missed. Poof. Like it never even happened.
But the day will come, peeps. For right now, they're still too young to understand that they'll eventually find their gonads and will outdo the smug, arrogant maidens in a myriad of affairs, including but not limited to armpit hair, paychecks and the awe inspiring ability to lose ten pounds just by going to the bathroom. Sadly, until then, they're at their mercy. Cowering, defeated and humble.
And that's why I bring Smarties~lots of them~as a reward. A spoonful of sugar helps the pride go down.
Just ask Mary Poppins.
And my husband.