Tuesday, June 15, 2010

CONSTRUCTION


So far, so good. No phone calls about death, maiming or accidental 'sharting' from Young Men's camp headquarters. Which may seem like a small thing to many of you, but you don't know my son like I do.

Anyway, I have something that you don't~besides a belly full of watermelon rumblings~and I'm sure you're all jealous. You can guess all day long, but I'm pretty confident this is not something at the forefront of your brain, so I'll just tell you. It's two ENORMOUS PIECES OF FOAM LAYING ACROSS HALF MY STAIRCASE THAT NOBODY UNDER 41 SEEMS VISUALLY AWARE OF, EVEN THOUGH THEY TRIP, STUMBLE AND PLUNGE TO THE BOTTOM OF THE LANDING EVERY TIME THEY COME DOWN, THE FOAM IS CLEARLY INVISIBLE TO THE NAKED CHILD'S EYE AND AFTER EVERY CRASH AND BURN, THEY LOOK AROUND AS IF THEY TRIPPED OVER A PEBBLE, THEN PULL THEMSELVES UP FROM THEIR CARPET BURNED KNEES, RUBBING THEIR GOOSE-EGGS AND BEAT A HASTY RETREAT, LEAVING THE HAZARD FOR THE NEXT UNSUSPECTING STAIR TRAVELER.

That's what I have. I knew you'd be jealous.

Now don't hate me because I have such well trained children, peeps. It's just that I've spent years perfecting my parenting skills and you still have a ways to go. Good luck with that.

And yes, in theory, I could carry the foam up to my sewing room where it's awaiting a new party dress of porch swing material. But that would just be enabling, (hard) and you all know what kind of mother I am, (lazy) so it's highly unlikely this will take place.

I'll take pics when Foam is complete. But until then, here is a quick snapshot of her...BEFORE the trusses and 2x4's. And no, there's no precise 'projected completion' date as yet~but I've promised they'll be in by Christmas.

For sure.

No worries.

Plan on it.

Course, the cost of lumber and plumbing is likely to skyrocket in between now and then, so the bid will be null and void, but that can't be helped....plus, I'm waiting on the sheet rockers...and the paint guy, but he's had an unexpected death in his family, so when he's done with the grieving process, we're next on his schedule...unless he gets cancer, which he's been known to get from time to time and project to project, so maybe by NEXT Christmas......






7 comments:

One Cluttered Brain said...

LOL!!!
You sounds so much like me.
Ahh, just take the L-O-N-G flight up K?

*sigh*

being a mom can be so hard sometimes!

kara Elmore said...

ok ... is this the SAME project you just told me about as you left my home after the basket full of FREAKING fabulous gifts which is WHY I totally love you as a sister because if you DIDN'T bestow such fun fabulous things to me I don't know if I'd even do anything for you like pictures of your kids even when their braces are off and they are totally hot and fabulous looking so I'll have to rethink the things I just promised whiz/dribble kid when he got his braces off and I'll have to make sure to SOMEHOW make you feel small and worthless as a person because ONCE AGAIN you have OUTDONE everyone in the family and no one can compare which is why we TOTALLY still love you .......

how was that for gramatically incorrect? I want you to know I had to think about EACH and EVERY single incorrectness and it almost SENT ME TO TEARS to write such suicidal incorrectness. Sheesh!!! :)

CAN NOT WAIT to see these "things" that await my arrival!!!!!!

kara Elmore said...

I mean "our" arrival ... as a blog whole.

Garden of Egan said...

I'm excited to see the completed project....... but I won't hold my breath.

Krista said...

Sheetrockers? Lucky duck. I have my husband doing all the hard labor and would love to just have..."people"....to do those things. Still waiting for the bathroom to be completed down there after TWO years. Sounds like you need those foam pieces there to cushion the falls of your kids. :-)

annie said...

I have that problem with anything being the the floor or stairs - why am I the only one that can see it?

Jackie said...

If it's anything like how projects go at my house it could be YEARS!