Thursday, June 3, 2010

NOT SUCKING

Hi. Heading out the door to watch my daughter play softball. After every hit/catch/throw, she shimmies up the chain link fence surrounding her pit and yells out,

"MOM! MOM! DID I DO GOOD?"

And of course, I yell back,

"NO. THAT WAS CRAP."

Because as her main goal in life is to be my opposition in all things, (remember Halloween?) if I say she sucks, she'll NOT suck, just to stick it to the man...or the mom~whichever~and win trophies for NOT SUCKING just to spite me.

And some of you well meaning peeps have suggested that "she may be in need of some extra attention." To which I say, this darling chickadee of mine already stands on the street corner named ENOUGH ABOUT ME, WHAT ABOUT ME? wearing fishnet stockings and sequined halter top, approaching rental cars with a come hither stare. (aka attention whore)

If she had any MORE scrutiny, she would be a bleeding, misshapen mole with irregular borders.

Bless her ALL ABOUT ME heart.

Wonder where she gets that.

Weird.






11 comments:

Holly said...

MOM of the YEAR!! LOL!! ;p
We/They are not from a cookie cutter...
Different NEEDS... You ADAPTED!! WOHOO! LOL!

kara Elmore said...

I say BRAVO to the mom who says "just because EVERYONE ELSE plays a sport ... doesn't mean I have to also!" YAY for you!!

HOWEVER ... you failed to mention that during "said game" you quickly drove off while she wasn't looking and came to my house.

'tis true.

One Cluttered Brain said...

LOL!

You win "Mother of the year" award.

Wow. i likey your post.

I am so glad I met you at CBC! ;)

One Cluttered Brain said...

Just like Holly said. Apparently I am not being original tonight. Go figure. *sigh*

Krista said...

Well, if it's not about us, who is it about? It's our own responsibility to be accountable for ourselves so it is really about me. Whatever. It's about you, Baby.

T said...

I was enjoying this but then scrolled down and read about your "Scarlett O'Hara womb" - now I'm laughing so hard I can't even praise your mothering :)

Garden of Egan said...

Oh, my hell! (oops sorry for swearing on your blog)
You took my Mother of the Year award away from me.
I so love you!
You carried her in your Scarlett O'Hara what more does she need?

Anonymous said...

She/you crack me up!....Anony :) PLAY BALL!

Serene is my name, not my life! said...

LOL! Okay seriously, I must know. What are you under the influence of when you write these things?
I need to get me some.

Mimi Sue said...

All I have to say is you should write a mothering book. See if Deseret Book would publish it. My youngest is EXACTLY like yours. Hate to tell you but she's 25 and still a pain. If I'd had your book things may have turned out different for her and me. Thanks for the sunny day Tuesday. Do you think we could have another one?? Mimi

See Mom Smile said...

I am a firm believer in not telling kids they are wonderful, and look wonderful and did wonderful when they are not and did not! It's real life people. Get used to it.

I like you sooo much.