Now there was other hetero-smut passing for love, too. Namely fornication, adultery and phone sex. But the thing that was just more than I could handle...that brought me to fling my head back, three snaps in a ZEE formation with righteous indignation and "Oh no you di-nt!" was the fact that EVERY SINGLE COUPLE...EVERY ONE OF THEM...KISSED~nay, MADE OUT PASSIONATELY when they had just. woken. up.
And they close talked. With morning breath! Because as EVERYBODY KNOWS, nothin' says lovin' like MORNING MUSK AND EYE BOOGERS.
So reality check~have the writers/producers never been the recipient of little baby sweaters knit over their teeth during the night? Do they have no sense of smell...or how about a healthy gag reflex? Not to brag, but when we say our morning prayers, I turn my entire body in the opposite direction and cup my hand over my mouth, just so the sulfuric vapors have further to travel before they slam into the rest of the families faces. It's what I do...because I'm self aware...and I'm human.
Therefore, I pose this question~ Where was Adam's Eve when this movie was being made? Sound random? Well, here's the basis. Bitty Boo was remarking that Heavenly Father didn't let Adam get very far before he was put back to slumber and Eve was formed. Like maybe two steps and here comes "deeeeeeep sleeeeeeeeeep." Which makes sense, really. I mean, he'd started making and naming things like Armadillos...and Octopus...and Tarantulas. I know. Who does that? Adam~when he's alone~that's who.
Then Eve is brought into the garden and suddenly the sky is being painted blue, there's a roast in the oven and flowers are being christened Violet and Rose. Shoulder shrug. I'm just the messenger here, folks. Put the gun down.
So my point is, Eve has gone missing. And this is just me talking, but it might have something to do with open mouth kissing in the morning musk dawn.
I'd flee, too. Ew.