POTATO HEAD

Above pictures entitled, "Why Heavenly Father created Lisa's feet." Also, an homage to my mother's family, as her maiden name is Stewart and HELLO! STEWART PLAID HEELS! If ever there was reason to go on living, here they are.

Kind of dizzy. I had to go back to bed this morn~and just so we're clear, I didn't WANT to, but I was FORCED~for what was meant to be a quick cat nap, but turned suddenly violent as I fell off~no, strike that~somebody SHOVED ME off~a snooze cliff and into a heinous death sleep. You're nodding your blog heads, I can see. Death sleeps are brutal, as you just. can't. drag. yourself. out. of. seizing. unconsciousness. and even if the house burned down you would be found cremated but still asleep in the rubble. Usually I reserve those for Sunday afternoons after church, since it always ends with half my face on the other side of my face and smear hair. So why today? Do tell!

Two words. Third son. He had a HERCULEAN brain fart and forgot he's 13, staying out until 1:00 AM~did you get that last part?~AE FREAKING EM! this morning. And what does a 13 year old 'sniffer' DO until 1:00 AM? Well, one thing is certain~anything BUT answer his phone.

It was on silent. (ssshhhhhhhh)

Yeah.

I know.

So are my eyes, but you can still HEAR THE SCREAMING FURY BURNING INTO YOUR FLESH, can't you? His fanny should have been in FLAMES as those silent calls came through.

Now, to be fair, because I'm NOTHING if not sensitive to another's plight, he did have permission to be gone and he mentioned a very vague "late" in passing. His late=1:00. My late=10:00. Oil and water. Also, he was with some wonderful young men, having "one last hurrah" (I think we're up to last hurrah #649) before another boy heads out to the mission field for two years. So it's not like he donned a ski mask as he went out the door. Still.

I'm not sure which was angrier, my heart or my jaw. Neither one would calm down, and even when he arrived home safe and COMPLETELY UNAWARES of the chaos he'd caused, they wouldn't let it go. They stayed up and snarked for a good hour afterward, palpitating and clenching, talking smack on teenagers and partial frontal lobe development.

Anyway, fast forward and there was a fully repentant boy living here this morning. Funny how things come full circle.

Which reminds me of the dark circles under my eyes, which are sitting on top of each other as I type this, compliments of my death sleep. Excuse me while I play Mrs. Potato Head with my face.